Thursday, August 20, 2009

What is God's will for Dini's Life?

So I have been blogging about searching for Gods will in your life, seeking it with everything you have and I have now been posed with this question. What is Gods will for Dini right now? So as the t shirt says lets make it all about me. Lets be real and search out what God wants for me right now. No hypothetical mumbo jumbo that I write and post into cyber space. Lets make it real, I need to now I have started writing this I am compelled to be honest and true to the nth degree.

Just a fraction of background so you know where I am coming from, I am a stay at home mother of two. And the nagging thought as my 4 yr old trundles to Kindy every day is WHAT NOW?? Next year he goes to School and endless days stretch before me. A friend suggested that going to work might be good for me, in that work will provide a source of satisfaction for me that you do not necissarily get from working in the home. It has provided me with a source of confusion and a desperate need to seek the Fathers will for my life. What is the next step? Is ensuring the family unit works well and smoothly the path for me, could it be hugely beneficial for all of them if I went back to work (as well as me?). Is it right to keep on keeping on without trying to find out where I am meant to be going?

How do I work out what Gods will is? I sat and thought about this, I have blogged that I think that I might be meant to rest now, which might be right, but I have no hard evidence, and feelings are fickle things, so I wont rely on them. So in the words of Mr Ed "Go right to the source and ask the horse!" Bring out your bibles people, I thought I could get a christian self help book, so many of them out there, not all bad either, but I thought I would go right to where its all originally written, then I can write my own findings here, and you can see me succede or fail spectacularly!

So this afternoon I wrote a list under a title called "What is God's will for my life??"
I have some points that just start the cogs working, I will put them down, they aren't difinitive because it is just the ramblings of me so take it as you find it, email me with suggestions, I will probably add to them, expand them and stretch them every way see if we can find an answer that makes sense, and hopefully be the answer given by God.

1. Glorify God in my life and Marriage.
2 Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your mind, and all your soul. And love your neighbour as yourself. (this poses a second question for me, how much do I really Love myself? )
3. Romans 12:2 2Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. ( Romans is a cracker full of this kind of info. Going to read Romans again)
4. My Body is a temple of the Living God 1 Cor 6:19
5. When we serve others, we serve God Matthew 25:35-40
6. Mary and Martha with Jesus. One cooking and complaining the other listening and learning.
7. Ruth and Naomi; no definite indication from God as to what they should do, they stepped out in faith and obedience and God blessed them both.
8. Rahab was obedient, she still suffered, but after all the turmoil she was blessed
9. A friend said to me that it might be ok to do what makes your heart sing. Meaning God might actually want me to do something that makes me happy.
10. Obedience is better than sacrifice 1 Samuel 15:22

So I don't think this is a complete list, its the list I am starting with and I am going to read the Gospels and Romans again. I can't just blog crazily and not have it really really mean something, even if only a handful of people read it.

Ready to come on my adventure? Geepers who knows where we'll end up! Yeehaw!

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Post script to last entry

I just want to clarify something about my last post. I do not want to encourage being a christian and doing NOTHING EVER. There is a story in the bible about the people with the talents, and the last person was scared to lose his talents and buried them, and did nothing with them. The master was not pleased with him when he returned, Matthew 25:14. God doesn't want us to sit on our buts and let the world serve us. He wants us to use the gifts we have to serve Him.

My last post was about accepting other Christians because of what you think they are doing for the church. We have to stop judging others and focus ourselves on God and do what HE wants us to do. So you still have to do stuff, it doesn't save you, only Christ on the cross does that, but God still wants us to use our gifts to Glorify Him.

The points I want to make are this
a) Focus on God and what He wants you to do
b) Stop looking at your neighbor and doing a tally sheet as to who is more Holy
c) Don't assume that a person is doing nothing, prayer is an important part of the health of the christian church
d) Don't shy away from the people who are having a hard time, maybe befriending them is the way God wants you to use your gifts
e) Most importantly Do Everything to bring Glory to God.

1 Samuel 12:20
20 "Do not be afraid," Samuel replied. "You have done all this evil; yet do not turn away from the LORD, but serve the LORD with all your heart.

Luke 4:8
8Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Worship the Lord your God and serve him only.'b]">[b]"

Romans 15:5
5May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, 6so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Being a worthwhile member of the Christian Church

What does it mean to be a worthwhile member of the christian church? What do you need to do to be accepted and incorporated? The bible teaches that we should be in fellowship with other christians, but the most important thing is to acknowledge that I am a sinner (ie I am not perfect like God and need His help with stuff day to day), Jesus died on a cross for me and payed my penalty so that God would see the perfect sacrifice that makes atonement for me and therefore I can be accepted by God as His child. Membership of the Christian Church applied for, accepted, move on in!

Churches are full of people and that is half the problem with them. We get our own ideas and have all our own problems and suddenly the beautiful creation that is meant to flourish under the watchful eye of God is running amok and creating its own rules and regulations twisted from the Biblical texts to say what they want it to say.

Have I fallen prey to this, in all honesty, probably. I am human, and in reality I do like to get my own way, no bones about it. And lets just say my current attendance record is looking pretty dim. If they existed, the truant church officer would have my name on the top of their list and they might be hunting me down.
But this leads to my next point. I have had depression for a long long time, to the point where recently I cannot and have not been able to participate in anything at church, let alone get there. So 8 months of not really attending anywhere. This has left me wondering "God what should I be doing at the moment?, what do you want me to Do? I want to be valuable and I want to serve you alone." I have no hard proof at the moment but I think that I am meant to be resting at the moment, caring for my family and not DOing anything in particular. (In reality there isn't much rest when you care for two small boys and a husband who works hard).

Suddenly you feel like you don't feature on a useful list anywhere, no use to anyone except your family, you aren't really attending or providing tithe so are you then not worthy? Do you not belong? If you commit a "Big" sin whatever you decide that is (God just has sin by the way, not big or small, just you aren't perfect, all bad is bad) are you no longer a christian? Do the normal lay people have the right to question the church and the way they go about their business? Suddenly you hit the Too Hard list, and you fall through the cracks. You don't need someone preaching forty thousand lectures to you, you need friends who love and care for you, and who aren't concerned necessarily with what you can DO for them. Maybe today you can't change instantly, maybe the lessons you are learning are hard and need ALOT of time to take root and to grow. Does it mean that you are less of a christian? NO! Are you less usefull, Not to God, not ever. To the church, maybe. Ouch that hurts doesn't it! Be realistic though, we all have the need for someone to DO something for us to be valued sometimes, and churches, as I stated before are full of people, just like us, exactly like us with problems and foibles just like mine.

One day I want to start a church that takes you no matter what. Can't clean on the roster this week, no problems. Severley depressed and can't get there this month, thats fine. Is your house untidy and you are just making the ends meet on life, cool come along! Where is the church that just says "be my friend, and I will be yours, and maybe we can help each other, but if we can't help each other physically, we can serve God and give Him Glory and we can do it together as friends"? There is great value in the person who prays for people from their house, so much value, we under-rate it. So many people are so Busy Doing stuff that they forget to consult the Father and His will for their lives.

Now tell me I am a sinner, I know it already anyway, but I am pretty sure God wants me to STOP doing stuff just for the sake of Doing it. Blasphemy!! Ok maybe blasphemy is a bit harsh, but it will irk the staid and solid workers in some churches. I think God wants me to care for my family at the moment, no singing, no creche, no cleaning roster, no craft. Rest. It even makes me question the reality of it. My psyche says DO Something, do everything and then people will love you and accept you. Are you doing stuff for that reason? Are you seeking the approval of the almighty church and its members instead of seeking the approval of the creator?

Romans 12:2
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Notice that romans does not suggest we seek the perfect will of the pastor, or church committee... This verse is also talking about stepping away from our worldly desires and seeking the desires of the Father. I think that worldly desires creep into the church fabric (as it will, none of us are perfect), and we start desiring that people DO instead of Be and we set a benchmark that will gradually get higher and higher, and we look at how much people DO, and DO for us. This is wrong. God may have my job as intercessory prayer for people. That is all. What are you going to see of that? If humility is a big part of your fabric, then you are probably not going to know about it, and God doesn't want us to throw a big party and say "OH LOOK I prayed all night for you, aren't i great??"

Matthew 6:6 (New International Version)
6But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

Matthew 7:21
21"Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. 22Many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?' 23Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!'

Now I have to be careful not to get on my own high horse. Churches will make mistakess and so do I. I don't want to judge or point out the faults to ensure you never enter a church again, or at all. I want to show you how you can make a difference in a church by taking time to seek the Father and His will for you and to accept it gracefully even if it means you aren't part of every committee and activity. Look at people and who they are, not what they can do for you. Show love and friendship to the people who seem hard to come along side of, who make you uncomfortable and are alot of work. So many people suffer so much that you can't see or know about, and will not willingly whinge about it to all and sundry looking for attention. They may have an iron wall up to keep you out to protect themselves because it is the only way they know how to survive. Hard is not Bad! Hard is just hard and alot of work, and it might make you uncomfortable. Uncomfortable isn't bad either, just doesn't conform to our "if it makes you feel good, do it!" philosophy.

Useful people in the church fabric are the ones who seek the Father and His will for their lives. They hunt it down, and pray constantly for it, they hunger and thirst for it. It isn't always the people who do the most who make the most difference.
It isn't to say that the people who do do stuff aren't in the will of God either. You can't Judge others, you have to look upwards and say Father lead ME today. Don't look over your shoulder at what everyone else is doing, Look to God, don't compare yourself to others, use Your life to Glorify God.

Jesus said this in Matthew 7:1
1"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.
3"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.

So in reading this I would suggest that we (including me) stop valuing people and churches by what they can do for us, what they are doing for the church, and what we think they are or are not doing. Concentrate on how you relate to God, seek Him and His righteousness, His plan for you. Thirst and Hunger for His Holy will in your life and nothing else. Don't look around at everyone else, we all have a mighty forest in our own eyes we need to deal with, and lots of us know it already! Concentrate on Him and seek His will for your life, not the churches, not the pastors, not the elders, No one but God. See where you end up, you might end up in exactly the right place, no where near where you thought you should be! As long as we seek Him He will direct our paths and that is the best and perfect map to be following.

Proverbs 3:5-6 (New International Version)

5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;

6 in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight. [a]